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-slaps self- Is this really happening?

So.

-blink-

Yeah. Another interview. Monday.

Two in one day.

Am I really awake?

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Revisiting Day 9 - Sexuality

Well, I have been gone for so long that I am way behind on that 30 Day Meme. Years in fact! And decided, instead of ranting constantly, might as well answer some of those questions. Keep my mind off the nastiness I'm feeling. So, as I look over my answers, I decided that my 'I'm straight.' answer to Day 9 wasn't enough. Without further ado, behind the cut:

Day 9 - SexualityCollapse )

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Speaking of Jobs

-shakes her head- I cannot believe the text I just got.

Backstory:

Baron Von Furman (eh, what else should I call him?) has a job at a local gas station. He enjoys it. It is only part-time, but he's good at it, getting exercise and doesn't have the pain he used to get working in Offices. As already told, I am out of work, have been since the 16th. I'm currently looking for something.

Now, he tells me that there is a job at Nike. This would be back in an Office, over-head lights, annoying bosses, just another person behind a computer fighting with the clock. And he tells me he wants it.

Ugh. Whilst I understand the pay raise, but is it worth it? Him coming home annoyed and upset. His constant headaches because of the over-head lighting. The lack of exercise? I don't get it. I like him how he is now. I don't want the Grump back.

-sigh-

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Seriously?

I have been applying for jobs since before I knew my job was ending at Block. One of those applications was for a local Grocery market in their Post Office. I was promised by their HR that my application would be forwarded to the head of the Post Office at their other location because they were needing someone. I was extremely pleased and had high hopes of landing this job as the interview went very well.

I call the following week. Not forwarded.

I call and speak directly to the person in charge of the Post Office. Not forwarded. Said she would talk to head of HR.

Call again today. Still not forwarded.

For something so promising. For a company I really enjoy. I feel disappointed in their system. I enjoy going to their store, I know quite a few of their employees. I was looking forward to being part of their ranks.

Such a huge let down. Don't promise if you do not intend to follow through. Whilst I understand a lot of people were looking for a job there, don't say that my application stands out, that you really like me, and that there was potential. Just makes me lose faith in your stores.

I'm bitterly disappointed in how things have happened here.

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And again...!

I'm doing it again. What is 'it'? Trying to get myself posting.

I do this every so often. Get a hair up my ass screaming at me to write. I do so for a few days, then it peters off into nothingness. This time, I decided to pay for 2 months outright... Maybe that will help? Who knows... I never seem to.

Things have been ... well, they have -been-.

Worked for H&R Block again this season. Was pretty decent all told. And now, the waiting game begins anew. That devastatingly boring time where I have several job applications out floating in the world and we see what happens. Tried to soften the blow by applying for Unemployment. Nope. My 52 weeks aren't up until late June. I hope to everything holy, unholy, and between, that I find a job before then.

The ennui I am feeling can be overwhelming at times. Like right now. I should be happy. Should! Why?

1. Finally cutting out the damn sugars in my diet. Have been for over 2 months now. Finally starting to lose weight. Eating better.

2. Been reading up a storm. 'The Forever War', 'Ender's Game', 'Armor', 'Snow Crash'. Excellent books all.

3. Playing LoTRO again. Kyraeli Hythe, Hobbit Minstrel Extraordinaire.

4. Just celebrated my 34th Birthday. Shoes, books and a fine meal at a local Seafood place.

And even with all that... That feeling of foreboding. Could be my anxieties rearing their ugly head, could be depression kicking back in after being out of work. All I know is that I want it gone. That's probably why I'm trying journaling again for the umpteenth time -- that desire to express what is in my head. Giving me something to think about. To analyze.

Maybe, just maybe, I can sort myself out again!

Eww, my favourite thing turned against me!

So, it is Saturday, the beau is at Game, I am home alone. This is like my ME day. He bought me an energy drink yesteday, and I was saving it for today, because I enjoy them.

Make lunch, throw on Bones OnDemand, cracked open the Rockstar Roasted Latte. Sip. Just fine. Drink. Repeat. Get half way through the can. Drink. Spit it out. I think I just drank snot.

Apparently, the can is old, the drink had curdled. Now, I feel naustious and I can't get the taste/texture out of my head.

GROSS

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*sigh*

I don't know why I give up on these things. I go through my day, thoughts collected, then sit in front of the computer to start typing them out and -blank-. I'm not sure what it is that keeps me from sticking to something.

In other news, my microwave is possessed. Well, not really, but it is. At odd intravels it starts beeping. It will periodically beep once then spurts of 4 to 5 beeps in quick succession. Who knows what is going on with it, but I can't decide if I should laugh or freak out. Silly machine.

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30 Day Meme Catch Up!

Yes, I realise I said I'd catch up awhile ago. I decided to reuse Semagic for helping me remember and to make it easier for me to post. I'll be a better LJ friend! :laughs:

Okay, let's get caught up, shall we? On to:

01 Aug 12 - Day 3: Your first best friendCollapse )

02 Aug 12 - Day 4: Your childhood fearsCollapse )

03 Aug 12 - Day 5: What you were like in high school?Collapse )

Will post more later~

Poetry: Spring is Coming

[My poetry is free-style, off the top of my head, and usually written in a minute or two. I never edit what I write. This poem was written when a guildie didn't believe I wrote poetry. And here it is, just to have it somewhere.]

Shiver
The cold breeze of the coming Winter embraces you
Shiver
Her icy stare bores into your soul
Gasp
Your breath leaves you as she touches your cheek
Frozen
Still
The world swirls, unrecognisable
Crack
The gentle touch of the dripping dew awakens you from your stupor
Blink
Crisp winds, carried by a soft warmth
Blink
Heat wipes away the cold, allowing movement once more
Step
The blades of fresh grass fold back beneath your step
Dance
The cold is gone
Spring is here
Rejoice!
For you are free again